In this week’s issue:

• Weekly Q&A
• Why the internet wants you to be a "plant collector" (and why I'm not sold)
• The one question that saves you hundreds of pounds
• The bug that eats your problems for you
• And more...

🇬🇧 Sheffield Answers

Every week, I get tons of questions about growing houseplants. In “Sheffield Answers”, I’m going to pick one out each week and answer it. Want to submit your own and get it featured next week? Click here to ask me a question!​

Question: Do you think light or support (moss pole/plank) has a bigger impact on leaf size? Tyler

My Answer: Light is what gives the plant the energy to make those bigger leaves in the first place. You can give a Monstera the greatest moss pole known to man, but if it’s stuck in a dark corner, there’s only so big those leaves are going to get. Support works a little differently. Plants like Monsteras naturally want to climb, and as they climb and attach themselves to something, their leaves tend to get bigger and more mature. Let that same plant trail around with nothing to climb and the leaves will often stay fairly small.

🪴 HOW TO & TIPS

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Apparently I'm supposed to be a "collector" now

I read something recently that made me put my brew down.

According to one of the big garden trend reports doing the rounds this year, houseplants are now officially "the fastest-growing category of collectibles." Not plants. Collectibles. Right up there with vintage cameras and those little Labubu things everyone's clipping to their bags.

And the line that really got me was this: plant collecting is "the new Pokémon."

Same buzz as gaming, apparently. Achievement, progression, gotta-catch-'em-all.

One report reckons 41% of Gen Z now call themselves plant collectors rather than plant owners.

Now, look. I'm not here to be the grumpy one at the party. More people loving plants is a genuinely good thing, and I've banged on plenty about how the boom has made rare plants cheaper and easier to get hold of. I'm all for it.

But something about the "personal museum" framing rubs me up the wrong way.

Because here's what happens when a plant becomes a trophy instead of a living thing. You buy it for the flex, not the care. You chase the next variegated whatever before you've learned to keep the last one alive. And you end up with a windowsill full of plants you don't actually know, slowly declining while you scroll for the next hit.

I've been there, by the way. Early on I bought plants purely because they looked impressive in a photo. Half of them died. Not because they were difficult, but because I never bothered to understand them. I was collecting, not growing.

The plants that have stuck with me for years aren't my rarest or my most expensive. They're the ones I've repotted three times, rescued from the brink, moved around the house chasing the light. The Pothos I've split into a dozen cuttings. The rubber plant that's outlived two house moves. Those aren't collectibles. They're more like old friends who've seen me at my worst.

So here's my gentle push-back on the trend of the year: by all means grow your collection. Fill the house. But grow it because you love the growing, not because a plant makes you look interesting at a dinner party.

A plant you can keep alive for five years says a lot more about you than a rare one you killed in five weeks.

(Am I being a miserable old sod about this? Hit reply and tell me. I can take it.)

🪴 JUST FOR FUN

The one question that saves you hundreds of pounds

Right, so if we're not buying plants to collect them, what should we be asking before one comes home with us?

Just one thing. Before you get to the till, ask yourself:

"Can I actually give this plant what it needs?"

That's it. Not "is it rare?" Not "will it look good on the shelf?" Just whether you've got the light, the time, and the know-how to keep it thriving.

Here's how that one question breaks down in practice:

Light first, always. This is the one people skip, and it's the one that matters most. A plant that needs bright indirect light will slowly waste away in a dim corner no matter how much you love it. Before you buy, know honestly what light your space actually gets, not what you wish it got. A north-facing room is not a south-facing room, no matter how much you squint.

Be honest about your time. Some plants are forgiving. A Snake Plant or ZZ will shrug off a fortnight of neglect. Others (I'm looking at you, Calathea) will throw a strop if you so much as breathe near them wrong. There's no shame in being a busy person. Just buy plants that suit the life you actually have, not the one you imagine you'll have when things "calm down." Spoiler: they never calm down.

Match the plant to the room, not the photo. That gorgeous plant in the shop was raised in perfect greenhouse conditions. Your bathroom, hallway or draughty landing is a different world. Think about where it's actually going to live before you fall for the picture.

Get this one question right and you'll save yourself a fortune in dead plants, and a lot of heartache too. The best-value plant is the one you don't kill.

📹 Watch & Grow: This Week On YouTube

👉 5 Things People Get WRONG About Watering Plants

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👉 Your Croton Is Crying For Help (Let's Fix That)

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Did you know?

The Oxalis triangularis (false shamrock) actually "sleeps" at night. Its deep purple leaves fold up like tiny umbrellas when the light fades, and unfurl again in the morning. It's called nyctinasty, and once you've watched a plant tuck itself in for the evening, you'll never quite see your windowsill the same way again.